Fake Friends & Opportunists: How to Identify Genuine Relationships as a Newcomer

Moving to a new country is exciting but also challenging. As a newcomer, you’re eager to build friendships and find a support system. However, not everyone who approaches you has good intentions. Many opportunists target new immigrants, seeing them as easy prey for business schemes, investment scams, or even financial exploitation.

So, how can you spot fake friends and build genuine relationships in your new home? Let’s dive into the who, what, when, where, why, and how of dealing with opportunists as a newcomer.

1. Who Are the Opportunists Targeting Newcomers?

Opportunists can come in many forms, including:
✅ Fellow immigrants who see new arrivals as potential business recruits or clients.
✅ Acquaintances or coworkers who quickly become friendly but later ask for favors, money, or business investments.
✅ Community members who promise to “help” you settle but have hidden financial motives.
✅ Online connections who pretend to offer job opportunities, mentorship, or financial advice but actually push multi-level marketing (MLM) schemes or scams.

2. What Are the Signs of Fake Friends?

Watch out for these red flags when meeting new people:
🚩 They are overly friendly too fast. Real friendships take time, but opportunists will rush to gain your trust.
🚩 They keep bringing up business, investments, or money. If every conversation leads to you “needing” to buy something, be careful.
🚩 They make you feel guilty for saying no. A genuine friend respects your choices, while an opportunist will pressure you.
🚩 They disappear when you don’t give in. Once you refuse their offer, they stop talking to you.
🚩 They gossip or badmouth others. If they talk negatively about others, they’ll likely do the same to you.

3. When Do These Opportunists Usually Appear?

Opportunists typically target you when you are:
📌 Newly arrived and adjusting – They know you’re looking for friends and information.
📌 Looking for a job – They’ll offer “great business opportunities” instead of real jobs.
📌 Receiving your first paycheck – They might push financial products like insurance, investments, or loans.
📌 Attending community events – Some people attend just to find new “clients” rather than genuine friendships.

4. Where Do These Encounters Happen?

Be extra cautious in these common places:
🏡 Community centers & religious groups – While many offer genuine support, some members may use them to sell products or recruit for MLMs.
📱 Social media & Facebook groups – Scammers and pushy salespeople target newcomers in online groups.
🏢 Workplaces – Some colleagues may invite you to “business opportunities” that turn out to be pyramid schemes.
🎉 Filipino gatherings – Be wary of those who focus more on business than genuine connection.

5. Why Do Newcomers Fall for Opportunists?

As a newcomer, you may be more vulnerable because:
🔹 You want to feel welcome and accepted. You’re looking for a support system, and some people take advantage of that.
🔹 You trust fellow immigrants. While many Filipinos help each other, some use community ties to sell unnecessary products or services.
🔹 You’re unfamiliar with local systems. Opportunists may pretend to “help” but are really profiting from your inexperience.
🔹 You don’t want to offend people. Filipinos often struggle to say “no” firmly, making it easier for others to pressure them.

6. How Can You Protect Yourself & Find Genuine Friends?

💡 Take your time – True friendships develop naturally, while opportunists rush things.
💡 Be cautious with financial discussions – If a new friend keeps asking about your salary or suggesting investments, be wary.
💡 Set boundaries – It’s okay to say “No, I’m not interested.” You don’t need to explain further.
💡 Check for consistency – A genuine friend cares about your well-being, not just what they can gain from you.
💡 Join hobby-based groups – Instead of networking events, look for interest-based groups like sports, music, or book clubs.
💡 Be aware of common scams – Research common financial traps for immigrants, like fake investment schemes and overpriced insurance.
💡 Trust your instincts – If something feels off, it probably is.

Final Thoughts

Newcomers deserve real friendships, not relationships built on hidden agendas. By being aware of opportunists and setting clear boundaries, you can build a strong, supportive social circle without falling into financial traps.

Have you encountered opportunists as a newcomer? Share your experiences in the comments!